The Truth Is…

I find myself searching for someone that will never be found.  I am looking for someone who is ambitious, happy, stable, loving, kind, a believer and follower of God.  Someone to compliment my rollercoaster life.  Someone to break bread with.  You know, a ride or die.  Someone with focus and goals.  This person has to fit MY ideal image in all of these areas.   This person has to understand all of the intricacies that make me who I am. 

I have searched from coast to coast, looking for my ideal person.  While on the road I found an abuser, a recluse, and an imposter.  While it is easy to give these individuals a title and be judgmental of who they are, the truth is the person with the real issues is me.  The truth is by searching I am going outside of myself to find something that I have made up in my mind to be ideal.  On that note, I am attracting just the opposite of what I am looking for.  Ambitious becomes lazy, happy becomes sad, stable becomes chaotic, loving becomes jealousy, kind becomes selfish, and believer becomes nonbeliever.  How on earth can this person compliment my rollercoaster life much less break bread with me?  Forget about ride or die that becomes run for your life girl.  That is just what I have been doing, running for my life. 

I am now tired of searching, feeling disappointed, disconnected, and running for my life.  I am now forced to face my demons head on.  What I have found is my truth.  The truth is:

• People are not projects that require repair or even someone’s opinion of who they are.
• Either you accept someone for who they are or leave them alone.
• Each person has their own self work to do. Be respectful of their process.

With that said, my search is over.  As I sit here alone with my ideal ideas, I discovered that my ideal person was never lost.  Therefore, my searching was pointless.  As a matter of fact, I have had that person all along.  I have been running and searching everywhere for something that was in plain sight.  She is me and I am her, a woman who is willing to stand in her truth, submitting to personal growth, and spiritual maturity.  I challenge you to stand in your truth.

A New Way to Overcome Obstacles

 

Life is laden with obstacles, both big and small.  While each person's experiences differ, everyone has their fair share of problems.  Some people face unemployment, while others face marital problems, some face depression, while others face financial distress.  Whatever issues you are facing right now, it is important to remember that each trial is temporary.  While examining your situation, self-honesty should be in the forefront.  This is the best and only way to free yourself from repetitive chaos.  I will share what works for me when I am faced with my own trials.  But first, I will disclose those behaviors that did not work for me in the past:

1. I would rely on my own understanding of life, making up things as I go along to appease my bad decisions. 
2. I would insist that I was right in all of my decisions, despite the mess I had made. 
3. Whenever something went wrong I was never a part of the issue, it was not my fault.

When I held on to that faulty mentality, I noticed that my issues kept getting worse.  Then one day, I arrived at a point of pure frustration, frustration with life and life issues.  I had to make a change, life had to be better than the chaos I was living in.  In response to my frustration, I decided to change the way I look at life.  This is what worked for me:

1. I sought out knowledge through resources such as books and from people who I admired.
2. I changed the way I looked at myself in relation to the rest of the world.
3. I started assuming responsibility for my involvement in my problems.
4. I changed characteristics within me that were faulty and I embraced myself despite my imperfections.

While everyone may experience life differently, we all have obstacles to overcome.  In overcoming these obstacles, try examining your normal response to life difficulties. Then challenge yourself to respond in a different manner.  You will be surprised at the results. 

Here are some questions to reflect on:

1.       Who is responsible for your problems? 

       2.       Are your problems because of someone or something outside of you?

3.       How do you generally view life?

4.       What can you change to resolve the issue?

 

A Renewed Perspective

Life has many different views. It's okay to explore. -Monique

The idea of renewing your perspective requires a certain level of understanding and maturity.  You ask, "why is it necessary to renew my perspective?"  The answer is quite simple...to live a more tranquil life.  After all, there is always room for improvement.

We dream of a peaceful and tranquil life, so why not take the steps necessary to actually acquire our desires?  What is the barrier wedged between you and a peaceful life?  Are your dreams realistic?  What have you done thus far to transform your dreams into reality? 

You see...A renewed perspective takes the impossible and turns it into the possible.  It turns your dreams into reality.  It relieves you of stress and worry. It keeps you motivated, looking forward to a brighter tomorrow.  Renewing your perspective is necessary if you seek improvement in your overall quality of life.  It is time to get started with a renewed view, a renewed you, a more tranquil life. Here is a good place to start: What are some of your dreams or goals and what is preventing you from accomplishing them?